I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
