Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
You dont lie about slip and slides
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
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