Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Your face is a jimmy john
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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