Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
