She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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