I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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