How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
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