Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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