I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
