put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
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