he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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