when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
