The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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