I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
