Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Randomize
