Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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