she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
i think i just lost a toe
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
