Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
