She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
