so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize