Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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