Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Randomize
