thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Life is so much better after having sex.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
