Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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