after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
