so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Let's paint friendship bongs
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
