I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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