scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
