i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
