i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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