It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
