I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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