"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
