thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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