hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
