walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
