I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I could make wine with my vomit
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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