community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
