She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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