he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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