wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
