I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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