i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
