Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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