I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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