i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
