my soul wont recognize me after tonight
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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