singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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