All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
