Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
