Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize